Hallo fellow peacemakers, *smiles at the being in connection with others wanting peace*
I just wanted to share an experience of something with you all, and some thoughts I had which flowed from this.
If you look at my info you will see that I mention some family difficulties. Well, in one area of this (the main one in fact) I have had a breakthrough and would like to share something about this as I feel it is pertinent to our work for peace.
Before I go further I would like to say that it is my belief that peace starts with US, flowing on to those in our day to day lives (family, friends, co-workers, anyone we have contact with whether it be regular or just passing contact), then flowing on from there outwards. How we each treat ourselves and others being the core of things.
So, as I said, I have been having some difficulties in family and not long back a heated argument ensued which led to violence (a plastic bottle thrown back & forth, and then in my receiving a kick up the arse - literally!). Reactiviity had not been kept in check (on my part because of being ill with flu) and this was the result. Some space was then taken, my going to stay elsewhere for a while, and I was quite stressed about the whole thing and felt I had failed. Especially in light of the fact that I was supposed to be supporting this part of my family as they are about to bring a new life into the world - any day now too!
Then last night it looked like bubby may be about to come forth into the world and the Mummy was wanting me to be present as she felt it would help her, what with my being a'peaceful person' (brought tears to my eyes this, especially after my having argued with her partner, my son - plus it was actually ME who first picked up the plastic bottle and chucked it! As there was a bit of a stalemate going (I felt I always make the first move towards reconciliation - yes, how often does that happen and on global scale eh? - so was feeling that I wanted this to be different for a change) I had to look at what was most important in the moment and I felt this was that the Mummy give birth without these sorts of things going on around her. So I swallowed my pride, picked up the phone and asked for a ceasefire because of there being important things which required us to be united.
Cut now to scene in hospital, where I arrived having found out en route that Grandchild Numero 5 did not wish to arrive at the moment (something about things not being as he wished... the red carpet wasn't straight and somesuch - fussbudget!). Yet as Mummy was being monitored and tested priot to being sent home, to ensure all was fine with reluctant bubby, we were stuck in a small consulting room together for quite some time and started talking, really talking.
It was during this discussion that a penny dropped about word usage. A while back I had a Yogi teabag tag which had the words "Have reverence for yourself and for others". I have been trying to do this ever since, yet of course we slip. Sometimes it is not all that easy to apply these things, yet we can only keep trying. Anyway, I digress and this is long enough already, I had been musing on the Yogi tags use of the word reverence, instead of respect. And then over time started to understand a bit more and in the discussion in that wee sterile hospital environment found myself using the word reverence instead of respect, the original argument having ensued because I felt that the way I and myself were being spoken to and treated lacked this.
My son asked me about the meaning of reverence and I answered, the words seeming to flow very easily, that (in the context we were using it in) it was about life being sacred and precious and that we should treat others as being this, that when we are born for the most part (unless of course we are rather unlucky, as some are) we are viewed as special and precious and we are cared for. Then as we grow this seems to fade rather. Yet if we all treated ourselves and other like this and were kind, then there wouldn't be as many problems as there are in the world. There would be a sharing of the abundance as it would not be kind or reverent to life to allow for anyone to go without, and war itself would not happen as this is the ultimate in unkindness and irreverence.
And somehow, where having used the word respect - perhaps because it has more connotations of bowing to authority? - had failed, we came to an agreement that we would treat each other with reverence and therefore be kind and try to talk to each other abopt things going on in our heads (lots of fears etc of what others were thinking, oft without any base in reality - for fear is a real biggy!) before these thoughts and fears spiralled.
What I noticed next was how things felt different. Where there was normally awkward silence and a lack of free conversation and ease, suddenly we were all talking and laughing and this continued all the way home in the car. I went to bed feeling very good, even though I know there is still work to do to maintain this feeling, by continually being reverent (both to myself and to others, and this means examining my thoughts and actions continually.
P.S. As it is an extension of what I have been speaking of here, please feel free to check out Heart Bus, temporarily parked on Facebook awaiting those who will help build and create the web hub envisioned. Thanks, Eyal, for your help in making it easier to find it and promote it by sharing your knowledge of Facebook usernames with me. Every little thing we all do counts.
Reverence and respect are both insurmountable and formidable tasks to try to overcome. We have people on this website, that only have reverence and respect for their specific group only! Anybody outside of it, is the enemy.